Starting Over

As each day creeps by
each minute chiseling away,
breaking apart a healing heart.

They say what doesn't kill you
will eventually make you stronger,
but I'm on my knees--
weaker than ever--
wishing for Death's sweet release.

And I'm here praying
yearning for a clear signal,
and a guided light
in this pitch black forest of despair.

Clutching about randomly,
I waited for what was coming to me
but fell asleep while waiting
and a dream cloaked my mind from what is
and what can never be.

Maybe now I've seen what's up ahead,
or maybe I just made it up,
but at least I know what I want now.

I want to rip the clock off the wall
smash the glass
cut up my fingers
bleed and scream into time
then delicately spin the hands backward
a million times or more.

And then We will be again.
Then I can look into your eyes
and flash you a smile
as if our past doesn't bother us
and our future doesn't worry us.